Changes We Are Making In The Way We Parent Our Third Child

Third time’s a charm. At least that is what they say, right?

Well with the birth of my third child, came many things that my husband and I decided we were doing differently.

Would we let this child swing from the chandeliers and slide down stairway banisters? Would we make her wear a helmet everywhere she went?

Ok, maybe not that drastic of decisions, but still, we had some pretty big choices to make.

So what did we decide we would be doing differently in raising our little Ellie?

Let More Messes be Made

With my third child, it seems that I have become much more lax on the let them be messy part of life.

Don’t get me wrong. I have let my kids play with playdough once or twice in their lives. We have made slime as I shuddered and swore never again. And painting? It has happened before.

However the giant messes that I watch happen and do nothing to stop? Yeah, those are new to this kiddo.

You see, with the previous two kiddos while I cringed every time they started making a mess, the learning and laughter that resulted was contagious. Therefore I have put the panic attacks away for my third child as she lives life covered in marker with playdough in her hair.

They are only this age once, right?

Less Babyproofing More Teaching

If you walk into my house on any given day, one thing you will notice is that I skipped the baby proofing step.

Not only did I skip it, I burned the manual and buried it to.

Don’t get me wrong, to those of you who baby proof your homes, more power to you. Your babies often experience environments that present to be safer than the ones in my home.

As for me? I am not doing it.

One, I feel like baby proofing only takes the teaching moments from the day. We often go over phrases like “hot stove”, “big fall” and “if you do not leave those freaking drawers alone you are going to pinch your fingers again and I am going to laugh”. If I were to baby proof everything, then my child misses out on these key learning moments throughout the day.

It seems that with each child my baby proofing became less and less due to this and, well, laziness. Alas, it has worked for us so far.

Accepting the Help

This one has been rough with my third child, but none the less, I feel that it is important.

As Ellie has grown into a toddler, she has progressively become more involved in the household chores. My almost two year old now has to help unload the dishwasher anytime she catches it open, chooses to sweep the floor at the oddest times of day, and insists upon carrying her own loads of clean laundry upstairs to her room.

Many times I find that her helping in these ways is more work for me. Alas, it is amazing to see her wanting to help, especially when my older two children are crying because they are being asked to.

Therefore, I have embraced accepting the help that my toddler wants to provide in cleaning the house. If I can help her to develop a healthy sense of responsibility at this age, it can only mean good things for my future, right?

Teaching Responsibility Early

Speaking of responsibility, with my third child, teaching her responsibility early has been a big goal for me.

You see, with my older two kids I admit I probably did WAY more for them than I should have due to time and convenience. It was so much faster to just complete the task at hand myself rather than try to struggle with them through completion.

Now, I have a five year old and a ten year old who believe I am trying to commit them to a slow, excruciatingly painful death when I ask them to clean their room.

Therefore, with my third child we have been working on her responsibilities well before her second birthday. She understands picking up toys, and gladly carries her plate to the sink. She also is thrilled to get to put her wet diapers into the trash by herself.

At first, I felt bad about making her help clean her room at this age. Now, I realize the skills I am giving her way outweigh the ten minutes of Frozen she might be missing.

Less Material Gifts, More Experiences

One of the biggest changes that I am making in the raising of my third child, is the amount of material “stuff” that is purchased.

Honestly, if you walk into either of my older children’s rooms, at this point I feel like there isn’t even room to walk. They have all of the latest toys, pretty well any piece of clothing that they ask for, and yet, they still want to sit in front of a screen 24/7. The respect that they have for their “stuff” totally shows.

When I get to see the real them though, is when we get out. When we go on a hike, a trip to the zoo, a family trip. These are the times I watch my children blossom and reveal in their surroundings. And Guess what? None of that “stuff” matters then.

Therefore, with Ellie, the “stuff” is much fewer and further between. As the days go on, I have started weeding through the “stuff” that fills my older two children’s rooms and eventually, they will be more about the experiences as well, but for now, we are taking one step at a time.

Crazy Mom Talk

In reading this over, I feel like one may take that I feel that I have raised my kids “wrong”. In reality, I would not take back the decisions I have made for the world.

While my husband and I have made some different choices in the way our youngest is being raised, we have learned and experienced so much with my older two babies along the way. Some of these lessons have brought hours of laughter and days worth of smiles. Other choices, well they have left me pulling my hair and whisper screaming at my children in the bathroom of Target.

What decisions have you made differently with the birth of your younger children? Let me know below!

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